Daily Strip
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Three a day. World satire, indie-builder satire, cosmic ennui, Burg life. Originals only — plus an XKCD daily for the road.
German Chancellor Merz calls state election a 'disaster' for
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Watch: Fans cheer as Ed Sheeran speaks out over Macklemore c
A statement is forthcoming.
Trump says he is banning CNN and Politico from White House
A statement is forthcoming.
Canadians dream of Europe as Carney floats longshot plan for
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
International students, 'visa hoppers' and backpackers targe
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Judge blocks DHS from acting against a man over a harsh emai
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Superstars and broken records
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Russian drone hits train near Ukraine-Poland border soon aft
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
They lost their jobs after posting about Charlie Kirk, but s
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Saudi Arabia shuts key oil pipeline after drone attack launc
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Iran-backed Houthi rebels seize strategic Red Sea port in Ye
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
A pilot of the Amazon cargo plane in Miami crash warned it w
A statement is forthcoming.
TSA brings back gate access for some people without plane ti
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Russia and North Korea open the first road across their shar
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Germany's far-right AfD hails big victory in east, but falls
A statement is forthcoming.
Volcano eruption triggers flight suspensions at Indonesia's
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Trump's peace envoys to visit Moscow and Kyiv over weekend
A statement is forthcoming.
Trump administration pushes to remove tax exemption for priv
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Shopping to bar-hopping
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Israel expanding presence in Lebanon, officials say, as BBC
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Amid backlash, museum cancels planned Met Gala exhibit on fa
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Arizona's taps won't run dry, but water bills will go up und
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Icelanders vote on whether they want to join the EU
A statement is forthcoming.
Trump says U.S. has entered deal with Venezuela to take cont
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
U.S., South Korea and Japan to hold drill as North Korea ram
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Drugstores say Medicare's $50 obesity drug program is catchi
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Target faces renewed backlash for Halloween costume with 'mi
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Australia news live
A statement is forthcoming.
Australia news live
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Trump says Canada wants 'benefits' of being US state as Carn
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Is this the end of Harry and Meghan’s American dream?
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Hong Kong's Tiananmen activists guilty in national security
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Israeli military launches criminal probes into killings of 5
A statement is forthcoming.
Erin Patterson appeal live
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
South Korea shortens war games with US, citing Washington re
A statement is forthcoming.
Catholic schools chief denies wiping critical evidence after
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Palestinian American returns to his West Bank home, under si
A statement is forthcoming.
Aussie rules footy players referred to police as detectives
A statement is forthcoming.
Claressa Shields eyes Britain’s Price after stopping Kaye Sc
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
How a Sudanese refugee became a head teacher in a Chadian ca
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Clacton byelection
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Australia politics live
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
3 men set for lethal injection on same day in Tennessee, Ala
A statement is forthcoming.
Wednesday briefing
A statement is forthcoming.
Coalition divided over tougher gambling laws - with MPs warn
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Australia news live
A statement is forthcoming.
Sydney gardener fined almost $200,000 for removing 287 trees
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Iran issues new demands as Pezeshkian seeks deal
A statement is forthcoming.
Hundreds camp on sweltering Rome street amid tussle over squ
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Australian aviation crew carries out daring midwinter Antarc
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Meta says AI model accessed the internet and hacked another
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Daniel Andrews defends actions as opposition labels Labor ‘a
A statement is forthcoming.
Tuesday briefing
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Alan Jones trial live updates
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Alan Jones allegedly gifted cash and car to teenager he kiss
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
For most US small businesses, Trump's tariffs aren't the big
A statement is forthcoming.
Fifa scraps controversial World Cup investment plan
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Australia news live
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Australia news live
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Australia news live
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
About 900,000 Origin Energy customers affected by hack as co
A statement is forthcoming.
Pakistan’s Kashmir votes
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
One killed and 16 injured after van mows into crowd and peop
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Venezuelans hold vigil one month after devastating earthquak
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Families still search for bodies a month after Venezuela ear
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Blocked by censors, China's animal lovers take fight against
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
French lawmakers approve a sweeping social media ban for chi
A statement is forthcoming.
Australia news live
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Australia news live
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Australian man detained by ICE in Los Angeles after earlier
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Israel’s ‘Crimson Thread’ military barrier is strangling the
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Australia news live
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
The Open 2026: golf updates from day one at Royal Birkdale –
A statement is forthcoming.
Wednesday briefing
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Tuesday briefing
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Monday briefing
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
World Cup 2026: reaction to England’s quarter-final win over
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Trump administration rolls back a key protection for imperil
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Australia news live
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
U.S. launches new airstrikes on Iran and Tehran fires back a
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Search under way after Boeing 737 cargo plane goes missing o
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Australia news live
A statement is forthcoming.
Australia news live
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
NSW Labor toughens pokies stance as Sydney inner west mayor
A statement is forthcoming.
Cape Verde's historic World Cup ride ends after pushing Arge
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Friday briefing
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Russian missiles and drones kill 11 and cause damage across
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Wednesday briefing
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Tuesday briefing
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Australia politics live
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Venezuela earthquakes
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
Egypt 1-1 Iran: World Cup 2026 – live reaction
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
UN agency pauses evacuation of ships through the Strait of H
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Victorian Liberal MP Matthew Guy denies accusation he assaul
Noted. Filed. Forgotten by Thursday.
Europe heatwave live
Analysts remain calm. Analysts are paid to remain calm.
Australia politics live
Sources confirm this is still, somehow, happening.
What to know about a cold storage warehouse fire in Los Ange
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Australia politics live
The committee has been informed.
Almost three tonnes of cocaine found buried under Sydney pro
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Tunisia v Japan
A statement is forthcoming.
Israel and Hezbollah renew ceasefire after deadly flareup di
A statement is forthcoming.
Middle East crisis live
Analysts remain calm.
Australia news live
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
U.S. strike on an alleged drug boat kills 1, leaves 2 surviv
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Australia news live
Analysts remain calm.
Australia news live
A statement is forthcoming.
Protesters clash outside One Nation fundraiser while Labor says opposition parties will ‘give us chaos’
A statement is forthcoming.
Trump claims deal to end Iran war near as Tehran says 'nothing' finalised
Analysts remain calm.
Australia news live: Chalmers says Taylor ‘failed upwards’ as he criticises opposition leader for being out of touch
Analysts remain calm.
Australia news live: Neale Daniher’s daughter says ‘you inspired so many, but to me you were simply my dad’ as tributes flow at state funeral
Analysts remain calm.
Iran and Israel say they will pause strikes but warn of retaliation if ceasefire breached again
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Middle East crisis live: Israel says it has struck targets in central and western Iran
Analysts remain calm.
Hegseth attacks Europe over migration with beach 'invasion' D-Day speech
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
New York Knicks hold off San Antonio Spurs 105-104 for 2-0 NBA Finals lead
The committee has been informed.
Australia news live: Albanese says he is not ‘critical’ of One Nation voters; Asic investigates KPMG after whistleblower claims
Analysts remain calm.
President Trump says he will nominate Todd Blanche to serve as attorney general
Markets noted.
Midterm primaries 2026 live: results and reaction as six states including California and Iowa cast ballots
A statement is forthcoming.
Australia politics live: Chalmers says Wilson ‘not the sharpest tool in the shed’ in question time; government spent $3.8m on personal protection for CFMEU administrator
A statement is forthcoming.
Iran targets American base in region after US strikes Iranian air defences
Markets noted.
How Nigeria’s ‘algorithmic apothecary’ fuels a surge in risky herbal cures
Analysts remain calm.
A broken economy and an emboldened regime: Iranians abandoned to endure fallout from war
A statement is forthcoming.
Middle East crisis live: US attacks Iran missile sites as Tehran negotiators hold talks in Qatar
Markets noted.
Australia news live: Albanese warns Taylor to watch his back with next Liberal leader ‘just behind you’; Nacc chief Paul Brereton resigns
The committee has been informed.
Middle East crisis live: Pakistan hopes to host US-Iran peace talks ‘very soon’, says PM, after Trump claims Tehran deal ‘largely negotiated’
Markets noted.
At least 82 dead in Chinese coal mine explosion, state media reports
Markets noted.
UN gravely concerned by an Afghan Taliban law that has provisions on child marriage
Analysts remain calm.
Thursday briefing: How English football is pricing out its own supporters
Markets noted.
At least 131 dead in Ebola outbreak in DR Congo, official says
A statement is forthcoming.
Thunder’s Shai Gilgeous-Alexander to be named NBA MVP for second season in succession
The committee has been informed.
Trump warns Taiwan against declaring independence, hours after summit with China's Xi
Markets noted.
CIA Director John Ratcliffe met with Raul Castro's grandson in Havana, US and Cuban officials say
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Court overturns Alex Murdaugh's murder convictions and orders new trial
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Russia hits Kyiv with drones and ballistic missiles, killing 1 and injuring 31
The committee has been informed.
Budget 2026 live updates: Chalmers says Labor ‘the last ones standing in the sensible centre’ as Pauline Hanson warns of ‘communism taking over’
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
China should stop hoarding food and fertiliser, says former World Bank chief
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Virus-hit cruise ship arrives in Tenerife as medics await passengers
The committee has been informed.
Most Labour members think Starmer cannot revive party fortunes, poll finds
The committee has been informed.
Trump says US-Iran ceasefire still in place after exchange of fire in Strait of Hormuz
Markets noted.
Australia news live: royal commission hears NSW health system ‘not safe’ for Jewish people; beehives worth $150,000 allegedly stolen from rural property
Analysts remain calm.
Wednesday briefing: How Trump’s attempt to reopen to strait of Hormuz brought war closer again
The committee has been informed.
Iran says US military killed five civilians in attacks on passenger boats
Sources confirmed this is still happening.
Australia news live: NSW EV sales up 66% in first four months compared with previous year; Sydney school president ‘devastated’ children growing up around antisemitic attacks
Markets noted.
News live: Bell says royal commission will look at ‘ugly displays of hostility’ towards Jewish Australians as hearings begin
The committee has been informed.
Three dead in suspected virus outbreak on Atlantic cruise ship
Markets noted.
Universe still exists. Press relieved.
Hard week for cosmic doom-saying.
Iran and the U.S. are once again in peace negotiations.
The proposal has been in committee since 1979. The committee meets again Thursday.
Daily Strip · XKCD
Comic of the Day
Tyrannosaurus
Many of the smaller dinosaurs seem to have largely preyed on housecats.